No is just a dirty word, never gonna say it first…

Remember the commercials for Klondike ice cream bars: What would you do for a Klondike bar?  If you and your friends have the sense of humor of me and mine, the answers to that question usually range from crazy to perverted.  All in good fun, right? Sure.  But it leads to an interesting question.

What are you willing to do? What will you agree to, consent to, admit to?  Is it wrong to be willing to do something?  No, it’s not.

Is there a difference between willing and easy? You bet your sweet bippy there is.  We all remember the kids in school that were considered ‘easy’.  The girls that would make-out with any guy regardless to who they were or what they looked like or what their intentions were.  There were guys who were considered easy, too.  They were the guys you hesitated to dance with at school functions because you knew the rumors you would hear the next day in math class.  Easy was sleazy.  And God forbid your name rhymed with either word.

The difference is a matter of morals.  Easy means you don’t care who you’re with, or who knows it, or how many there are.  You have little respect for yourself.  If it feels good, do it.  Consequences be damned.

Willing is not the same thing.  You can be in a committed relationship and be willing to do a lot of things.  When you have a connection to someone, do you hesitate?  Do you say no?  We’ve all heard the saying, “I’ll try anything once.”  If you are comfortable with yourself, and comfortable with your partner, there is nothing wrong with being willing to let go of your inhibitions.  Why should you hesitate?

Few people are truly honest with themselves.  We are excellent at lying to ourselves and putting up our own obstacles.  Does that give us the right to take advantage of someone who’s honest enough, open enough, strong enough to know who they are and what they want? No!  Does that mean that I will settle for someone who’s convenient instead of waiting and searching for the one that is as honest, open and strong as I am? No!

Stay strong in your truth.  Be honest with yourself about who you are and what you want.  Don’t let convenience draw you into a compromise you won’t be happy with later on.  Don’t second guess yourself.  When it’s right, you will know.  Your instincts are usually pretty accurate.  But you have to be willing to look yourself in the mirror and be totally, perfectly, brutally honest.

I’m willing if you are….